Too Much Time. Time to Think. Time Full of Thinking. Too much Thinking.

Yikes.

And that pretty much sums up what most of my winter break has been like. With no school or work, I've found myself with a lot of free time on my hands. I wish I was more like some of my friends, who actually use all this extra time making cards, knitting scarves, writing poems, and composing songs - things I consider to be highly productive. As for me, I actually do start out with making a list of things to do, but the list only ever goes so far as to have two or three things checked off. What do I do the rest of the time? I'm not quite sure.

But, this I do know. I've been doing a heck of a lot more introspective thinking. Without a people-filled environment, and having my family at work for most of the day, I have a lot of down time...or, what you can call, alone time. Some people enjoy alone time, but I think too much alone time will be the death of me. There's no one to distract me from my own thoughts! And with that, there's no one, and no impending assignment that is due, to distract me from thoughts on my own life.

It becomes all too easy to start thinking about all my fears, failures, and insecurities. And who wants to deal with those? Can you say overrated? Okay, well, maybe not. But still, not my type of fun.

In spending some good, honest time with myself, I always come to realize that I am a bigger mess than I usually let myself believe. In the midst of this mess, however, it is comforting to know that God sees all of it and still accepts me. He is my way out of thinking too many introspective thoughts in such a way that is unhealthy. Focusing on who He is and what He has done refreshes my soul. All of sudden, my problems...seem so small, and His power so great. The Lord is sufficient for me, no matter what mess I find myself in. His grace is greater than all of my troubles.